The problem with toys

Toys! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I love having small kids.

Don't get me wrong, some days are pretty hellacious (is that a word or one of those words your family uses for so many generations that you think it's a word but really isn't? anyway...). For the most part it is fun and everyday brings something new. New words, new expressions, new ways to play. Unfortunately for parents, having small kids also means having things to play with- toys. I DO NOT love toys.

Of course this Christmas we added to the madness, as if we already weren't struggling to walk through our house without tripping over something. I didn't want to go overboard but I got to tell you, I was pumped to get some new things to play with. As a stay at home mom, I am the primary play partner and things meant for kids three and under get old fast. Christmas and birthdays are about the only times we really shop for our kids so... things can easily get out of hand. And of course they did.

So after Christmas I freaked out and tried to purge some toys. Broken toys. Toys with missing pieces. Those stupid toys you get out of Happy Meals. At the end of it, I didn't end up with a lot to get rid of but I did find the pieces to most everything else. This was a victory. The side of me that decorated school planners weeks ahead and never missed an assignment or appointment jumps for joy when all the toys are put away and organized. But, as you know, that only lasts for about five minutes. After all, if you are going to have toys, you should probably let your kiddos play with them- hello!

If you are feeling me on toy insanity and you wish to regain your life (and living room), here are some ideas that may help you to do just that:

• Go through and throw out all broken toys, toys with missing arms/legs, dirty/stained baby dolls and stuffed animals, etc. 
• Now, go through and pick out things to donate. Old toys, played out toys, toys that are no longer developmentally appropriate, etc. Donating toys that are still in good shape is an excellent lesson for your child in sharing resources and loving on others. 
• Lastly, put away toys that you wish to keep (maybe for future children) but that your kid is done with. Yea, maybe your two year old still picks up the baby toy links and rattle every once in a while but it's not enough to keep from finding it under the couch every other day or in the bottom of the toy box. Redirect your child to more age-appropriate toys and form new interests.

What you will have left are the things that your kid still loves, new stuff and all the missing pieces to a bunch of different things. Put those missing pieces back where they go. Check. You are doing well. Here is what I am doing with what we have left:

There are several kinds of toys and the type determines where it goes. 

• If it is a toy that I trust my little ones getting into on their own, I put it down on a shelf so they can reach it and do self-play. For example, I have an old suitcase on the floor in my girls' room with dress-up clothes in it. Right next to that are wooden block trays. On the shelves in their rooms is a toy computer, a shape sorter, some chunky puzzles and some containers with little figurines.  
• If it's something that they will need help with or someone to play with them, I put it up and so they have to ask my to get it down or I can encourage them to play with it, with me. This includes games and toys with small pieces that maybe are appropriate for my 3 1/2 year old but not my 1 1/2 year old. 
• If it is more of a focused learning activity, it goes in the white plastic container. I've got lacing cards, matching games, a doctor kit, Bananagrams, alphabet stacking cubes, etc. in there. This is a new concept for us but I feel it's very Montessori-esque. I bought a cheap-o rug that stays rolled up on top and when my daughter wants to play with something in the white container, she is to get the rug down, roll it out, get out what she wants to play with on the rug, play, then put that toy/game/activity away before getting out something else. Some moms I know would think this is ridiculous but it is totally working! Sofia almost loves the routine of getting out the rug, choosing an activity, etc. The other thing is, that this new system is encouraging me as a mother to spend good, quality, intentional time with my kids. Just the other day I found the game "Pretty Pretty Princess" at the Goodwill for $.50 and we have played it everyday since, at least twice a day. On the rug. Love it. 

Some things I have realized about toys are that my kids are probably always going to have some, kids will carry toys all around the house and hoard them in mini shopping carts and strollers, no one wants to play with something that has missing pieces or that's broken, some toys are meant to be thrown in a bin and others are meant to played with more direction. Just like behavioral discipline is good and healthy for a growing child, I am learning that discipline with toys is healthy too. Yes, you have to take care of your things. Yes, you have to share with people who have little when you are in abundance. And if you live in my house, yes, you have to roll out a rug if you want to play with certain toys. 

My final thoughts on toys are these. Go for good wooden toys that last. Stay away from battery operated toys (I'm not going to lie, though, that I don't know where Leila would be without her glow worm). Find good quality, second hand toys and games to pacify your child's need for something new. Consider a toy swap with friends or other moms. Love on your babies and spend time with them- that's better than any gift or toy there is.